So long ago.

In my mind, her face changes everytime I try to remember what she looks like. The skies were blue and I had to leave her and I had to go kill people that might have been so very lovable. We were seeking land that didn´t belong to us, nor could we speak their language. Cold steel. Warm Sun. So very lovable. The lands, so many foreign roads. Trees, roadside for kids to climb on and laugh. Gardens, appletrees to steal from. So many girls, very lovable, give them a kiss as we went by. Wine and coffee, no end in sight. Paradise. No doubt. Coming here doesn´t seem to bad. Too many nights had past, pouring rain. Blinded by the lights. Gunfire. Hell. Hell. HELL. I had gone down to thinking she had left my heart, head and spirit for I had no money. Drunk as hell. Gunfire. Light. Bang. Can´t see. Take me back, darling, take me back. The twisted little souls with arms that were no use as they had been soaked. I lay there covered with earth. Pain. Gunfire. I lay there. I needed to replace my fear of death and my frozen heart with the warmth of sun. No use, it´s hell.

Now many years after people I never knew come from far away to visit my grave, put flowers on. Remember me, silently, go on with their lives. These are my grandchildren? I fear. Say goodbye. Cold. Remember me as I remember her.